Going to the bathroom at work

**Sanfran327** · 02-20-2012 09:15 AM

Here's the scenario: you have to make boom boom at work, so you head towards the facilities using that awkward, butt-cheeks-clinched-together stride to avoid any premature evacuation. You arrive to a bank of four stalls, and the one all the way to the left is the only one in use. How many stalls are available for use?

What do you do, hotshot? What do you do?

**Dipper9** · 02-20-2012 12:49 PM

Originally Posted by Sanfran327

Here's the scenario: you have to make boom boom at work, so you head towards the facilities using that awkward, butt-cheeks-clinched-together stride to avoid any premature evacuation. You arrive to a bank of four stalls, and the one all the way to the left is the only one in use. How many stalls are available for use?

What do you do, hotshot? What do you do?

If its an absolute emergency, you use the stall all the way to the other side. The two in the middle remain open as buffers. However, if at all possible, I leave and look for a bathroom with ZERO stalls in use.

**Sanfran327** · 02-20-2012 01:36 PM

Originally Posted by Dipper9

If its an absolute emergency, you use the stall all the way to the other side. The two in the middle remain open as buffers. However, if at all possible, I leave and look for a bathroom with ZERO stalls in use.

Are you available to come in and give some training to the folks in my building?

**Pedro Cerrano** · 02-20-2012 02:02 PM

Man I don't get why people are so worried about taking a dump when others are in the bathroom. Unless it's an important person (like a boss or client) I don't really have any shame in blowing a bathroom up as nosily as possible.

**Sanfran327** · 02-20-2012 02:12 PM

Originally Posted by Pedro Cerrano

Man I don't get why people are so worried about taking a dump when others are in the bathroom. Unless it's an important person (like a boss or client) I don't really have any shame in blowing a bathroom up as nosily as possible.

I typically don't care either, but you definitely don't drop a bomb next to another dude when you can help it. If the only two options are next to an occupied stall, I'll come back in 30.

**Jimbo81** · 02-20-2012 02:23 PM

So, a friend and I were talking about bathroom etiquette the other day.

He just "checked in" to "the bathroom at work" on facebook.

Hilarious!

**paulcoates** · 02-23-2012 06:50 PM

true story.

A friend of mine was telling me a story about two guys in his office who were passing a pound cake back and forth (underneath) to each other while in the stalls.

Beat that

**crissfan172** · 03-23-2012 02:30 PM

The last 10 minutes of class today were absolute torture. I have to say, though, I'm proud of how calmly and cooly I walked out of the classroom at the end.

**VThokie7** · 03-23-2012 07:50 PM

Earlier this week I went into the bathroom and this particular bathroom is one stall and one urinal. The stall is occupied, which is fine I just have to go #1. I finish up, and as i'm washing my hands. Looking in the mirror and all the sudden the pooper comes walking behind with a Kindle in hand. Face buried in it, doesn't even bother to wash his hands. As I leave the bathroom he continues down the hall reading the kindle. I saw him again this week in the hall still with the kindle. No book is good enough to throw out the laws of personal hygiene, wash your hands!

**waroriole** · 03-23-2012 08:08 PM

Originally Posted by Sanfran327

I typically don't care either, but you definitely don't drop a bomb next to another dude when you can help it. If the only two options are next to an occupied stall, I'll come back in 30.

I try not to come out of the stall if others are in the bathroom. I'll wait for them to finish washing their hands.

**Ooooooohhhh!!!!** · 04-12-2012 03:59 PM

I've kept this story to myself for several months. I randomly told it to a coworker today and she's (yes, I told this story to a female) been laughing all day.

We have a single-toilet, unisex bathroom in our department right next to some cubes. The guys in the cubes outside of it say there is only one rule, the number one rule. I don't use that restroom during the day because everyone can hear you going to the bathroom.

One night a while back I was the last person here and I had to deuce. Since no one was here I figured it was safe to use the "local" restroom. I do my business and as I finish up I look back to make sure everyone disappeared appropriately. To my utter dread not only has the log not gone down, but somehow it has managed to lay across the drain. It looked like a tree that had fallen across a river.

Of course now I'm starting to panic a little. I flush again as soon as I can, but that doesn't dislodge it. I flush a third time. No dice. Now I'm frantically looking around the small restroom looking for something that could help, but there is nothing. At that moment the reality of the situation hit me and I knew what I had to do. I unwound copious amounts of TP, made a baseball mitt sized wad, flushed for a fourth time, and manually dislodged the log. A subsequent fifth flush ended the ordeal.

It wasn't one of the better moments of my life, but I'm proud of myself for not backing down from the challenge. I think I'm putting the number one rule back in effect full time now.

**SJA** · 04-12-2012 04:28 PM

1. If you're going to pretend to wash your hands, at least pretend to dry them as well. Your attempt to fool me is useless if I know that you didn't dry your hands and the door handle is still dry.
2. If you actually wash your hands, please actually dry them as well.

**bobmc** · 04-12-2012 07:01 PM

Originally Posted by SJA

1. If you're going to pretend to wash your hands, at least pretend to dry them as well. Your attempt to fool me is useless if I know that you didn't dry your hands and the door handle is still dry.
2. If you actually wash your hands, please actually dry them as well.

Haha - today I pee'd and came out to the sink (the golf course washroom is like "work" for a retiree) - the other guy in the loo, whom I knew, was washing his hands (and drying thank you very much) and I decided to not wash but felt awkward so I took a towel and blew my nose. It broke the ice and we chatted and moved on....

Just thought of another story - my best friend cannot pee next to any stranger. He freezes up. If he's just starting and someone appears, he freezes, fakes it flushes and goes to another bathroom.

Not work but bathroom humor - I also peed next to Tommy LaSorda in the Vero Beach ST (ST for retirees is like work) complex bathroom. He came in cussing about folks asking him for an autograph when he just wanted to take a piss . btw - I didn't freeze and chatted him up with elan....

**Dipper9** · 04-12-2012 08:03 PM

Originally Posted by bobmc

Haha - today I pee'd and came out to the sink (the golf course washroom is like "work" for a retiree) - the other guy in the loo, whom I knew, was washing his hands (and drying thank you very much) and I decided to not wash but felt awkward so I took a towel and blew my nose. It broke the ice and we chatted and moved on....

Just thought of another story - my best friend cannot pee next to any stranger. He freezes up. If he's just starting and someone appears, he freezes, fakes it flushes and goes to another bathroom.

Not work but bathroom humor - I also peed next to Tommy LaSorda in the Vero Beach ST (ST for retirees is like work) complex bathroom. He came in cussing about folks asking him for an autograph when he just wanted to take a piss . btw - I didn't freeze and chatted him up with elan....

OMG...opportunity of a lifetime to say....

"Hey Tommy, let me hold that for ya while you sign my hat!"

**paulcoates** · 04-12-2012 08:13 PM

Thread: Going to the bathroom at work

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