Another Boston Series cometh

[NewMarketSean]

As a 20+ year resident of HoCo before moving, the thought of this makes me laugh.

"Sure pal, you wanna go to Sonoma's over in Owen Brown. The easiest way to get there is.."

...and then give them directions that make them have to make 20+ turns on random roads named after poems.

Great stuff.

I loathe Columbia.

[Pedro Cerrano]

I loathe Columbia.

And it loathes you....

Although I recall you love Ellicott City (my actual hometown) so you're OK in my book. Plus I got you in my sig.

[Pedro Cerrano]

Passionate Orioles fan from Columbia. But agree that Columbia is the dividing line between sterile DC fans/Northern Virginia Red Sox bandwagonners and Baltimore. I chose my side. The Eutaw Street Rowdies need to come out and mop up some Bandwagon Nationers tonight.

It's more of the dividing line between Ravens and Deadskins' fans than anything. I'd say the NoVa Bandwagoner line is drawn more south of Laurel.

[SilentJames]

As a 20+ year resident of HoCo before moving, the thought of this makes me laugh.

"Sure pal, you wanna go to Sonoma's over in Owen Brown. The easiest way to get there is.."

...and then give them directions that make them have to make 20+ turns on random roads named after poems.

Great stuff.

There are no bars in HoCo. There are places where alcohol is served - but there are no bars.

A bar is an establishment where you have the following:

-A real wooden rail with ill-fitting stools that have been replaced over the years and no longer match

-At least two televisions that can, at some time be hooked into the speakers or turned up loud enough to hear

-At least two bartenders that live in the neighborhood

-Patrons include, young college-aged kids, people who have lived in the neighborhood their entire lives, and at least one elderly man (known only by a nick-name usually something like "Garlic") that sits at the end of the bar and chimes in with completely un provoked stories of how "things have changed" laced with so much salty language that it causes a parson from the church across the street to become slightly dizzy.

-A place where children are welcomed, but frowned upon. Unless of course that child happens to be especially hard.

-A jukebox, make or model does not matter, that needs to include (but not limited to) the following: CCR, Beatles, Rolling Stones, Aretha Franklin, James Brown, The Hold Steady, Dave Matthews, Jaco Pastorius, Rush, Queen, The Velvet Underground, Megadeth, Dexter Gordon, Duran Duran and They Might Be Giants.

-There must be at least three varieties of beer that cost less than four dollars a pint

-The food must be good, but not great. And the menu must include at least one fried item that might not normally be fried and one item that seems way too classy for the establishment thus making you question its quality

-The only crazy stuff on the walls should be things donated by patrons and hung by the bartenders themselves.

And finally

It must play the Orioles at all times.

I have a place as such.

[Pedro Cerrano]

There are no bars in HoCo. There are places where alcohol is served - but there are no bars.

A bar is an establishment where you have the following:

-A real wooden rail with ill-fitting stools that have been replaced over the years and no longer match

-At least two televisions that can, at some time be hooked into the speakers or turned up loud enough to hear

-At least two bartenders that live in the neighborhood

-Patrons include, young college-aged kids, people who have lived in the neighborhood their entire lives, and at least one elderly man (known only by a nick-name usually something like "Garlic") that sits at the end of the bar and chimes in with completely un provoked stories of how "things have changed" laced with so much salty language that it causes a parson from the church across the street to become slightly dizzy.

-A place where children are welcomed, but frowned upon. Unless of course that child happens to be especially hard.

-A jukebox, make or model does not matter, that needs to include (but not limited to) the following: CCR, Beatles, Rolling Stones, Aretha Franklin, James Brown, The Hold Steady, Dave Matthews, Jaco Pastorius, Rush, Queen, The Velvet Underground, Megadeth, Dexter Gordon, Duran Duran and They Might Be Giants.

-There must be at least three varieties of beer that cost less than four dollars a pint

-The food must be good, but not great. And the menu must include at least one fried item that might not normally be fried and one item that seems way too classy for the establishment thus making you question its quality

-The only crazy stuff on the walls should be things donated by patrons and hung by the bartenders themselves.

And finally

It must play the Orioles at all times.

I have a place as such.

So what you're saying is, you've never drank in Old Ellicott City?

[NewMarketSean]

And it loathes you....

Although I recall you love Ellicott City (my actual hometown) so you're OK in my book. Plus I got you in my sig.

Oh yeah, EC is actually one of my favorite places in MD. Such a shame it's got Columbia so close to it. I'd prefer it to be surrounded by woods like it was in olden times before Columbia puked all over the surrounding area.

[byrdz]

And it loathes you....

Although I recall you love Ellicott City (my actual hometown) so you're OK in my book. Plus I got you in my sig.

When I lived in Baltimore that was one of my favorite places to visit/hangout. There was a brewery there I liked to go to but I can't remember the name now, it's been almost a decade since I lived there. Maybe it was even called Ellicott City Brewery?

[Pedro Cerrano]

When I lived in Baltimore that was one of my favorite places to visit/hangout. There was a brewery there I liked to go to but I can't remember the name now, it's been almost a decade since I lived there.

Ellicott Mills Brewery?

[Orioles1954]

Well, I'm grateful to have lived in Columbia, and am raising my family of Baltimore fans there. There are advantages to living on a street named Rocksparkle Row

[NewMarketSean]

I would like to print a shirt that says "Shut Yarmouth".

Maybe the bandwagoneers who are familiar with Cape Cod would get a kick out of that.

[byrdz]

Ellicott Mills Brewery?

Checked on the interwebs, I think that's the one, too many brain cells ago.

[Pedro Cerrano]

Well, I'm grateful to have lived in Columbia, and am raising my family of Baltimore fans there. There are advantages to living on a street named Rocksparkle Row

My favorite is, and always will be, "April Journey."

"What's your address?"

"3242 April Journey"

Classic.

[SilentJames]

Well, I'm grateful to have lived in Columbia, and am raising my family of Baltimore fans there. There are advantages to living on a street named Rocksparkle Row

No, there are no such advantages to living on Rocksparkle Row. I refuse to embrace this concept.

Rocksparkle Row? Is that down the street from the corner of Unicon St and Carebear - Ticklefun Way?

[Pedro Cerrano]

No, there are no such advantages to living on Rocksparkle Row. I refuse to embrace this concept.

Rocksparkle Row? Is that down the street from the corner of Unicon St and Carebear - Ticklefun Way?

No but it's very close to "Forty Winks Way" and "Setting Star"

[SilentJames]

No but it's very close to "Forty Winks Way" and "Setting Star"

Hay-Zeus H. Christmas man. I swear its like an entire town was cobbled together from a kiddie-school storybook class.

So long as the Hemingway section has something like "Shotgun End" I'm fine with it.