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BaltBird 24

When to throw down, and when not to throw down

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Moreover on the same subject, kind of, my little brother's best friend's big sister. She is absolutely beautiful and I mean beautiful. Right now she is going around asking 8 years old, same age as my brother if they would rather have a wife that was very pretty but very mean or a wife who was very ugly but very nice and almost everyone has said the first. My brother said the first and I about strangled him. She does this in proof to her mom that she doesn't have to be a nice person. Gosh

Eee. Well, jeez. I do believe there's such a thing as a happy medium. :P It's possible for a beautiful woman to also be intelligent and fun and warm, and NOT have fluff for brains, just like it's possible for a homely woman to be a total b****. I just don't believe in discounting the importance of one in favor of the other.

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On the flip of that, why do woman complain that they can't find a nice guy whilst constantly going after the bad boys?

Now HERE is a mystery of the universe that will never be solved.

Squeeze and Witchy, your question holds the most simple answer ever. I don't understand how it's confusing in the slightest.

Guys enjoy women who want them. They also enjoy physical action.

Hair flipping = giving signs that you want a guy and probably want to get jiggy with him.

Ergo, hair flippers = big attraction to guys.

What's so hard to understand? We like them because we're big dumb males.

The bad boy thing though, that holds no answer at all. It's just pure stupidity.

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Um. Hmmmm..... Bad boys. How is this difficult to understand?

Do I want to spend my time with someone who will hold my hand and respectfully kiss me on the cheek after going for ice cream and a pleasant walk? Or do I want to go for a ride on a Harley along Devil's Slide (Hwy 1) at midnight to a beach party where I stand a very good chance of getting exactly what I want from a guy who isn't afraid to go after it? :cool: Yes, that's a tough decision.

OTOH, bad boys v. nice guys falls under the same category as hair flippers v chicks w/substance. There is a happy medium. There are guys who have enough bad boy in them to dance well, drink well enough to keep up with me, and still be gentleman enough to send me flowers and call me the next day, as well as able to keep up his end of a conversation on why Roberts is the best SCOTUS appt Dems can hope for/what the corporatization of space advances may mean/why Maxfield Parrish is the most underrated American artist of the 20th century, all while kicking my butt at chess. (I have no respect for a man who can't beat me at chess. And I'm no slouch.) They're just difficult to find. Well worth it when you do, tho. ;)

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NGuys enjoy women who want them.

Heh. It is to laugh. No you don't. You go after women you can't have. Because you can't have them. And then lament and moon for ages. It's in turns frustrating, sad and hilarious.

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Now HERE is a mystery of the universe that will never be solved.

Squeeze and Witchy, your question holds the most simple answer ever. I don't understand how it's confusing in the slightest.

Guys enjoy women who want them. They also enjoy physical action.

Hair flipping = giving signs that you want a guy and probably want to get jiggy with him.

Thank you, Will Smith. :D

Ergo, hair flippers = big attraction to guys.

What's so hard to understand? We like them because we're big dumb males.

I'm not talking about the actual act of hair flipping. I know that there are "signs" to show a guy you're interested (hair flipping being the least of those signs :D ). I use the "hair flipper" term in regards to the "girly girl, woe is me, I can't do anything for myself, I need some big strong man to help me or do it for me" type chick. I also understand the "guys need to be the hero" mentality too. This is why I'm not all that bitter (much :D ) that I'm not a hair flipper. What recourse does the hair flipper have when they break up with their big strong man? They are HELPLESS, can't be alone, and immediately start the search for the next big strong man.

I'm sure I sound bitter, but I know from personal experience how this works. Many (former) friends of mine were (are) hair flippers. One chick had been broken up with her off-on boyfriend of 5+ years for all of a couple of weeks before she roped the next one in. This one was ready to propose after 3 weeks. :rolleyes: She ended up breaking up with him and (once again) getting back together with the ex-boyfriend (about 2 weeks after the aforementioned breakup). This girl was constantly whaffling back and forth between men with mere weeks between breakups........because she couldn't be alone.

Another chick I know hooked up with this guy that is a complete ass. She knew it, but she loved this clown. She knew he hated us (the rest of the girls), but she tried to make things work with all of us. (We went out to the bars as a mixed group of guys/girls several times, but things always ended badly because of this guy.) This guy slowly but surely eroded the friendship she had with the rest of the group of girls. She wasn't necessarily a hair flipper, but exhibited some tendencies there towards the end of the friendship with us.

/rant

I'll agree wholeheartedly with you on the "big dumb males" comment. :D

The bad boy thing though, that holds no answer at all. It's just pure stupidity.

At my.....ahem....advanced age, bad boys really hold no appeal for me. I will admit, that they once did. But that was years ago. I've grown up since then. Hair flippers never grow up. :P

Witchy

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Heh. It is to laugh. No you don't. You go after women you can't have. Because you can't have them. And then lament and moon for ages. It's in turns frustrating' date=' sad and hilarious.[/quote']

Yeah, I'm with squEEze on this one (shocker!!). Showing a guy you want them (aside from the physical "want"), is the quickest way to get them to bolt for the door. They get scared and panic. It's absolutely exhausting, the tight-rope one has to walk in the beginning stages of a relationship.

And squEEze -- we (chicks) do that too (go after guys we can't have). For most of us (men and women alike), the appeal to acquire what we we can't have is just too tempting a challenge to pass up for the most part.

Witchy

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Um. Hmmmm..... Bad boys. How is this difficult to understand?

Do I want to spend my time with someone who will hold my hand and respectfully kiss me on the cheek after going for ice cream and a pleasant walk? Or do I want to go for a ride on a Harley along Devil's Slide (Hwy 1) at midnight to a beach party where I stand a very good chance of getting exactly what I want from a guy who isn't afraid to go after it? :cool: Yes' date=' that's a tough decision.

OTOH, bad boys v. nice guys falls under the same category as hair flippers v chicks w/substance. There is a happy medium. There are guys who have enough bad boy in them to dance well, drink well enough to keep up with me, and still be gentleman enough to send me flowers and call me the next day, as well as able to keep up his end of a conversation on why Roberts is the best SCOTUS appt Dems can hope for/what the corporatization of space advances may mean/why Maxfield Parrish is the most underrated American artist of the 20th century, all while kicking my butt at chess. (I have no respect for a man who can't beat me at chess. And I'm no slouch.) They're just difficult to find. Well worth it when you do, tho. ;)[/quote']

1. Ok wait, so the whole acting like a nice guy and giving you respect thing is not what you want? Seriously? I know this may be a stupid question but you have to realise I'm still very naive in the ways of women. Teach me, fair lady, teach me.

2. That last paragraph.....stop showing off Squeeze. :D

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Yeah, I'm with squEEze on this one (shocker!!). Showing a guy you want them (aside from the physical "want"), is the quickest way to get them to bolt for the door. They get scared and panic. It's absolutely exhausting, the tight-rope one has to walk in the beginning stages of a relationship.

And squEEze -- we (chicks) do that too (go after guys we can't have). For most of us (men and women alike), the appeal to acquire what we we can't have is just too tempting a challenge to pass up for the most part.

Witchy

You guys are actually right about this. But, at the same time, if a guy knows he can get what he wants from a chick, he is liable to go and get it. I'm not talking relationships here. Purely physical. If you say to a guy 'take me', chances are he will.

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I'm not talking about the actual act of hair flipping. I know that there are "signs" to show a guy you're interested (hair flipping being the least of those signs :D ). I use the "hair flipper" term in regards to the "girly girl, woe is me, I can't do anything for myself, I need some big strong man to help me or do it for me" type chick. I also understand the "guys need to be the hero" mentality too. This is why I'm not all that bitter (much :D ) that I'm not a hair flipper. What recourse does the hair flipper have when they break up with their big strong man? They are HELPLESS, can't be alone, and immediately start the search for the next big strong man.

I'm sure I sound bitter, but I know from personal experience how this works. Many (former) friends of mine were (are) hair flippers. One chick had been broken up with her off-on boyfriend of 5+ years for all of a couple of weeks before she roped the next one in. This one was ready to propose after 3 weeks. :rolleyes: She ended up breaking up with him and (once again) getting back together with the ex-boyfriend (about 2 weeks after the aforementioned breakup). This girl was constantly whaffling back and forth between men with mere weeks between breakups........because she couldn't be alone.

Another chick I know hooked up with this guy that is a complete ass. She knew it, but she loved this clown. She knew he hated us (the rest of the girls), but she tried to make things work with all of us. (We went out to the bars as a mixed group of guys/girls several times, but things always ended badly because of this guy.) This guy slowly but surely eroded the friendship she had with the rest of the group of girls. She wasn't necessarily a hair flipper, but exhibited some tendencies there towards the end of the friendship with us.

/rant

Witchy

Right, I wasn't talking about the pure act of hair flipping either. I meant the same girls you're talking about, the ones that lead you on and then once they've reeled you in, bye bye. You know, pr*** teasers. The reeling in is just too irresistable, what can I say.

Plus, the whole girly girl thing....believe it or not we actually like our women to be girly. :D No way in hell I want a girl who can beat me at armwrestling and then take me down in fantasy sports or whatever. We males are a proud race. We need to always be the one in charge. Girly girls can't do crap for themselves and thus we are always the saviour. It's great.

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1. Ok wait, so the whole acting like a nice guy and giving you respect thing is not what you want? Seriously? I know this may be a stupid question but you have to realise I'm still very naive in the ways of women. Teach me, fair lady, teach me.

Well, yes and no. I very much want to be respected. My opinions, treat me like a lady, all that. Yes. But..... I like a guy who knows when it's time to not respect me, if that makes any sense. To not be hesitant to make the first move and go after what he wants.

A lot of this has to do with what I call "the James Bond Effect." (I may get kicked out of the feminists' club; I LOVE James Bond. I do. I know, I know, but I can't help myself.) Ultimately, the thing that makes bad boys so attractive is the same thing that make hair flippers so attractive. Confidence. Not over confidence, which is a turnoff, but confidence balanced with intellect and humor and being completely comfortable with yourself. Those four things together are completely irresistable. James Bond is the total embodiment of those things. Scoundrel he may be, but he's my kind of scoundrel.

2. That last paragraph.....stop showing off Squeeze. :D

I can't help that I'm spoiled. :D

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Plus, the whole girly girl thing....believe it or not we actually like our women to be girly. :D No way in hell I want a girl who can beat me at armwrestling and then take me down in fantasy sports or whatever. We males are a proud race. We need to always be the one in charge. Girly girls can't do crap for themselves and thus we are always the saviour. It's great.

This is nothing more than insecurity. You'll grow out of it. I'm probably the last woman on the face of the planet who needs a knight in shining armor. How I ended up with one I'm still trying to puzzle out.....

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Well, that's a good barometer for her, I guess if she plans on marrying an 8-year-old. How old is this "little brother's best friend's big sister"? Is she a full-fledged hair flipper or an in-training hair flipper??

I just love some of the conversations we have on here sometimes. :D

Witchy

She is 18, just graduated from high school and WANTS to attend Oral Roberts ironically. She'll probably wind up going to some local community college though.

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Um. Hmmmm..... Bad boys. How is this difficult to understand?

Do I want to spend my time with someone who will hold my hand and respectfully kiss me on the cheek after going for ice cream and a pleasant walk? Or do I want to go for a ride on a Harley along Devil's Slide (Hwy 1) at midnight to a beach party where I stand a very good chance of getting exactly what I want from a guy who isn't afraid to go after it? :cool: Yes' date=' that's a tough decision.

OTOH, bad boys v. nice guys falls under the same category as hair flippers v chicks w/substance. There is a happy medium. There are guys who have enough bad boy in them to dance well, drink well enough to keep up with me, and still be gentleman enough to send me flowers and call me the next day, as well as able to keep up his end of a conversation on why Roberts is the best SCOTUS appt Dems can hope for/what the corporatization of space advances may mean/why Maxfield Parrish is the most underrated American artist of the 20th century, all while kicking my butt at chess. (I have no respect for a man who can't beat me at chess. And I'm no slouch.) They're just difficult to find. Well worth it when you do, tho. ;)[/quote']

That's not what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the general fascination. I'm talking about the "oh woe is me, I can't find me a nice man..." complaining whilst at the same time the bad boy fascination is going on. It's like a part of the brain shuts down and completely overlooks all glaring signs that this isn't a nice man, even though you just complained to somebody for about an hour about it.

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Ah. Well, yeah. Got me there. That's as stupid as chasing after hair flippers and whingeing that they won't give you the time of day. The stupidity of hormones and wanting what you can't have. A bad boy who'll fall for you so totally that he'll change his ways. It will never happen. He won't change, and you'll be miserable.

It's the excitement and thrill. Which wear thin after a while. Bad boys are fun to hook up with, but eventually they just spend all your money, put a butt shaped dent in your couch and cheat on you. Why do we never see this? I dunno. As I said, hormonal blindness. Same reason guys don't see that brain dead shallow cream puffs aren't all they're cracked up to be, either.

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You guys are actually right about this. But, at the same time, if a guy knows he can get what he wants from a chick, he is liable to go and get it. I'm not talking relationships here. Purely physical. If you say to a guy 'take me', chances are he will.

*files this away for future use on Brian Roberts*

:D:D:D

Right, I wasn't talking about the pure act of hair flipping either. I meant the same girls you're talking about, the ones that lead you on and then once they've reeled you in, bye bye. You know, pr*** teasers. The reeling in is just too irresistable, what can I say.

"reeling in" + SoBird's "catch and release" comment......Lord, do you boys look at us like slimy scaly fish?? :P

Plus, the whole girly girl thing....believe it or not we actually like our women to be girly. :D No way in hell I want a girl who can beat me at armwrestling and then take me down in fantasy sports or whatever. We males are a proud race. We need to always be the one in charge. Girly girls can't do crap for themselves and thus we are always the saviour. It's great.

OY. You're one of them. :D

Witchy

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