Jump to content
orioles119

Help! Rejected Engagement Ring!

Recommended Posts

This is the one she fell in love with...

http://www.gordonsjewelers.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3304958&cp=2664341.2664354&pg=3&kpc=1&cp=2664341&categoryId=2664354&parentPage=search&searchId=33504000663

<a href=http://www.gordonsjewelers.com><img src="http://zgor.imageg.net/graphics/product_images/pZALEGORD1-3612776t240.jpg"></a>

Yikes! How could she do anything while wearing that ring? You'd have to take that thing off every five minutes unless you lead a very sedentary lifestyle. Even then, what about stuff like washing dishes?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Well, you didn't get hammered too bad then...Without seeing it in person, it sounds like a $600-1200 ring.

In terms of the ring she wants...That is a cluster ring...Those things are dead in the water...Should cost just a few hundred dollars.

One single stone is always more valuable and really, looks better...What she wants is a cocktail or right hand ring...that's not really an engagement ring.

It looks there is a single marquise or an oval stone in the middle of that gaudiness...

Anyway my wife was hooked on an engagement ring, a solitare diamond on a celtic band. Once I found out how it was made however (setting was sautered on at a single point) I talked to a jeweler who said that my wife could lose the diamond quite easily if she were to smack the setting against anything. So I decided on a traditional ring instead and I'm glad I did because she's bent some prongs on the ring I gave her. As a compromise I bought the celtic band without the setting and that is now her wedding ring.

I'll agree with the other posters that the ring shouldn't be really important, it's the fact that you are asking her to spend the rest of her life with you that matters. And you can always get her a ring like that later in life for an anniversary gift...

Edited by JTrea81

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
This is not complicated. Bring that sucker to a real good store, and you and her look at some diamonds together. You cut a deal with them getting the one diamond, you put up another many, many dollars. If she is young, then this is an investment in trust and working together. It's not like she is a prima donna for the rest of her life, or whatever the fear is. You gotta shape these chicks the way you want em.

Wait... you can't be serious. That's your idea of "trust and working together"? :eek:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Well... to be honest, I agree, but the ring itself that I have has just been soured on my part. I definitely don't want to just give it away (someone said $450), but I won't go crazy over it.

I'm thinking anywhere between $850 - $1200 would be nice to get.

I agree though that it does look like an anniversary ring moreso than an engagement ring. However, we've been through so much together that I love her too much to just let go this easily.

However, I do think she's being unreasonable considering that I spent $1400 on her and now she expects me to spend $1500 when I don't make that much money to begin with.

I almost want to say... if you want it, you've got to help me pay for it.

Well based on what SG said, you should be able to get a ring like that for less than $1,500, but maybe based on what happened, it's best to get the exact ring she wants from the store she lists.

Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wait... you can't be serious. That's your idea of "trust and working together"? :eek:

lol

Yeah, that made me shake my head a bit.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
If anything the guy could get a cheap ring and then after she says yes, go look together, but that takes something out of it as well, since the ring you propose with wouldn't be the one she continues to wear.

This is something similar to what I did. I had bought her a very nice engagement ring for what I could afford at the time. We were in the process of buying our house and we weren't interested in getting married right away.

After 2 years of saving, we both went to the jewelry store and I traded the original ring I had picked out for a new, much more expensive ring. I had went back to the same store that I had bought her original ring at, and if I remember correctly, I was able to get most of the money I paid for the original ring put towards the new ring (It may have helped that I bought myself a very expensive watch at the same time :D).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yes, that's exactly how it is and has to be for every couple that gets married...

...just as long as both the bride and groom are robotic walking stereotypes.

And about the "surprise"... why should getting married be a surprise? The entire rest of your life is something you should both plan for together if you plan on living together forever. What's the point of playing games and not letting each other know whether you want to get married or not, then putting her on the spot one day and forcing her to make a split-second decision that she may or may not be prepared for?

Yeah, god forbid the groom want her to be surprised. Typically, men don't propose unless they are pretty darn sure that the woman is going to say yes. We're not talking about the guy who proposes on the jumbotron to the girl he's met twice. If you're pretty sure she'll say yes. You've asked her father. Why not want to try and surprise her with the time/place/ring? Getting married won't be a surprise...that's why the groom may want some part of it to be one. It's not a game. Maybe he just wants to feel like he did something special for her instead of just doing exactly what she has already planned out.

I dated my wife starting in 10th grade. I knew she would say yes. She knew I would ask. But, I wanted there to be some element of surprise and excitement in the whole affair. And guess what? She liked it...and we aren't even robots!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah, god forbid the groom want her to be surprised. Typically, men don't propose unless they are pretty darn sure that the woman is going to say yes. We're not talking about the guy who proposes on the jumbotron to the girl he's met twice. If you're pretty sure she'll say yes. You've asked her father. Why not want to try and surprise her with the time/place/ring? Getting married won't be a surprise...that's why the groom may want some part of it to be one. It's not a game. Maybe he just wants to feel like he did something special for her instead of just doing exactly what she has already planned out.

I dated my wife starting in 10th grade. I knew she would say yes. She knew I would ask. But, I wanted there to be some element of surprise and excitement in the whole affair. And guess what? She liked it...and we aren't even robots!

The "robots" comment was referring to the "it's all about the bride" part of the post referring to her buying an expensive dress and him renting a tux, etc. I was just pointing out that those things shouldn't be taken as inevitable. There are all kinds of couples who have all kinds of different weddings. As for the surprise aspect... maybe as TGO suggested I did take his use of the word "surprise" a little too far. I still think in the cases of most couples I've known who have had surprise proposals, it has been a matter of playing games and there's been much drama on the part of the girls about "why hasn't he bought me a ring yet?" and handwringing by the guys about when and how to do it and whether she'll say no. Why are you not engaged as soon as the two of you have had the conversation where you decided to get married? Is the material gift the thing that makes it official?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wow, this is some thread. I couldn't read it all but I feel sorry for you. This could be a hard lesson but valuable for later on in life. My wife picked out her own ring insisting on no diamonds, just a gold ring with bows on it. I thought she was the greatest woman (both looking and acting) I had ever met. We got along great when we dated, never quarrelled or disagreed about anything. After we got married things were peachy keen for a year until she got pregnant.

While pregnant she turned into someone I had no idea I had married. She was hostile, moody, irritated over the slightest even perceived offense, real or imagined and blew every little thing out of proportion including despising my Mother.

Unfortunately, 25 years later she still resembles mostly the woman who changed when she got pregnant, not the one I dated and was married to for a year. She also likes to remind me that I was too cheap to get her a real diamond (despite the fact she insisted on not having one) and when I recently asked her if she wanted a nice diamond ring for her 25th anniversary she insisted I give her money for a face lift so she could meet someone else!:(

However, she has also repeatedly told me she will never leave me because I have great Medical Insurance that covers her even after I die! I tell you this not to scare you from marriage but to make you realize that even if everthing is rosy when dating it may just be an illusion and not reality that will last. If there are problems while dating, just forgettaboutit!

Let's just say that if I were you, I would be doing like Scottie said. Put the ring on Ebay and vamoose into the next territory as they used to say in the old Westerns! Also, be thankful you didn't make a huge mistake in marrying someone you would end up divorcing most likely. :eektf:

Furthermore, when you do meet Miss Right, ask her to go with you to pick out the ring. As you can see, even then you may get blamed years later, but at least you tried.:(

I seriously mean every word I am typing here and urge you to follow this advice. Please!

I'm confused... back in May you started a thread seeking advice on buying a ring for your long suffering wife...

you said then:

My wife has been married to me for 25 years so she deserves some kind of medal. I just want her to finally have something nice. I see a lot of women wearing big diamonds and she certainly shouldn't take a back seat to any of them.

It sounds like you had a different story about your "long suffering wife" back then. If she's such a shrew.. why were you saying "she shouldn't have to take a back seat to anyone" in the ring department???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm confused... back in May you started a thread seeking advice on buying a ring for your long suffering wife...

you said then:

It sounds like you had a different story about your "long suffering wife" back then. If she's such a shrew.. why were you saying "she shouldn't have to take a back seat to anyone" in the ring department???

It sounds like his situation got worse after he tried to buy the ring, for one thing.

But who really knows what's real.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Couple things I really don't understand here.

Orioles119..You haven't been really clear about the Dad situation, and how she found out about the ring in the first place? The way I see it, you asked her did for his blessing, he gave it to you, and somehow word got back to you either from her or you that she didn't like the ring you showed her Dad? Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is shaping up to be a very awkward actual engagement whenever it happens.

Also what SG said about getting her imput...I agree with TS, what happened to the surprise in all this? Should the guy get down on one knee and go, "will you marry me, and if so, what ring would you like, and I'll go get it tomorrow?"

If anything the guy could get a cheap ring and then after she says yes, go look together, but that takes something out of it as well, since the ring you propose with wouldn't be the one she continues to wear.

There are lots of choices out there...Several different shapes, ring color, type of ring...Diamonds in ring or not?

The girl is going to be wearing that ring, in theory, for the rest of her life...She should like it.

You get ideas from her...Not neccassarily have her pick it out..just ideas.

Some woman have to have big...Some prefer smaller.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Am I cheap or is $4,200 a lot for a ring? Damn!

"What's a 13 letter word for engagement? He went to Jared!"

Average us around $2800 in most places...We rarely sell one under 5000 grand though...Most of our customers buy bigger/higher end rings.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yikes! How could she do anything while wearing that ring? You'd have to take that thing off every five minutes unless you lead a very sedentary lifestyle. Even then, what about stuff like washing dishes?

Shouldn't wear your ring when you do that kind of stuff anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


Orioles Information


Orioles News and Information

Daily Organizational Boxscores

News

Tony's Takes

Orioles Roster Resource

Orioles Prospect Information

2018 End of Season Top 30 Prospects List

Prospect Scouting Reports

Statistics

2019 Orioles Stats

2019 Orioles Minor League Stats

Baseball Savant Stats







  • Posts

    • Why not. Eddie started at DH. 
    • I'll make this simple.  Here's a list of everyone in MLB history who's caught at least 1500 games.  There's only 33 of them.  Name the 20 who you think are better than Gary Carter.                                                                                                                                                                                               Rk            Player    G From   To   Age    PA   AB    R    H  2B 3B  HR  RBI  BB IBB   SO HBP  SH  SF GDP  SB CS   BA  OBP  SLG  OPS         Pos                                          Tm 1     Ivan Rodriguez 2543 1991 2011 19-39 10270 9592 1354 2844 572 51 311 1332 513  67 1474  58  31  76 337 127 64 .296 .334 .464 .798     *2H/D34                     TEX-FLA-DET-NYY-HOU-WSN 2       Carlton Fisk 2499 1969 1993 21-45  9853 8756 1276 2356 421 47 376 1330 849 105 1386 143  26  79 204 128 58 .269 .341 .457 .797    *2DH/735                                     BOS-CHW 3        Ted Simmons 2456 1968 1988 18-38  9685 8680 1074 2472 483 47 248 1389 855 188  694  39  11 100 287  21 33 .285 .348 .437 .785   *2DH3/759                                 STL-MIL-ATL 4        Gary Carter 2296 1974 1992 20-38  9019 7971 1025 2092 371 31 324 1225 848 106  997  68  33  99 180  39 42 .262 .335 .439 .773    *2H9/375                             MON-NYM-SFG-LAD 5          Bob Boone 2264 1972 1990 24-42  8148 7245  679 1838 303 26 105  826 663  90  608  20 142  78 191  38 50 .254 .315 .346 .661    *2/H35D7                                 PHI-CAL-KCR 6       Johnny Bench 2158 1967 1983 19-35  8674 7658 1091 2048 381 24 389 1376 891 135 1278  19  11  90 201  68 43 .267 .342 .476 .817   *253H/798                                         CIN 7         Yogi Berra 2120 1946 1965 21-40  8359 7555 1175 2150 321 49 358 1430 704  91  414  52   9  44 146  30 26 .285 .348 .482 .830    *2H79/35                                     NYY-NYM 8      Jason Kendall 2085 1996 2010 22-36  8702 7627 1030 2195 394 35  75  744 721  51  686 254  36  63 176 189 89 .288 .366 .378 .744     *2/H79D                         PIT-OAK-CHC-MIL-KCR 9    A.J. Pierzynski 2059 1998 2016 21-39  7815 7290  807 2043 407 24 188  909 308  68  895 129  28  58 241  15 23 .280 .319 .420 .739       *2H/D                 MIN-SFG-CHW-TEX-STL-BOS-ATL 10    Gabby Hartnett 1990 1922 1941 21-40  7297 6432  867 1912 396 64 236 1179 703   1  697  35     127  93  28  8 .297 .370 .489 .858       *2H/3                                     CHC-NYG 11         Tony Pena 1988 1980 1997 23-40  7073 6489  667 1687 298 27 107  708 455  72  846  23  68  38 234  80 63 .260 .309 .364 .673    *2/H39D5                     PIT-STL-BOS-CLE-HOU-CHW 12     Lance Parrish 1988 1977 1995 21-39  7797 7067  856 1782 305 27 324 1070 612  62 1527  37  23  58 197  28 37 .252 .313 .440 .753    *2D/H397                 DET-PHI-CAL-SEA-CLE-PIT-TOR 13     Yadier Molina 1983 2004 2019 21-36  7655 6970  701 1963 379  7 156  916 507  49  782  66  42  70 254  66 37 .282 .333 .405 .738     *2/3HD5                                         STL 14   Benito Santiago 1978 1986 2005 21-40  7516 6951  755 1830 323 41 217  920 430  52 1270  38  26  70 204  91 69 .263 .307 .415 .722     *2H/37D         SDP-FLA-PHI-TOR-CHC-CIN-SFG-KCR-PIT 15       Brad Ausmus 1971 1993 2010 24-41  7102 6279  718 1579 270 34  80  607 634  69 1034  69  82  37 201 102 53 .251 .325 .344 .669    *2/H3456                             SDP-HOU-DET-LAD 16      Jim Sundberg 1962 1974 1989 23-38  6899 6021  621 1493 243 36  95  624 699  31  963  22 118  38 159  20 37 .248 .327 .348 .674      *2/H7D                             TEX-MIL-KCR-CHC 17          Al Lopez 1950 1928 1947 19-38  6608 5916  613 1547 206 43  51  652 556  55  538  14     121 137  46  9 .261 .326 .337 .663     *2/H543                             BRO-BSN-PIT-CLE 18       Mike Piazza 1912 1992 2007 23-38  7745 6911 1048 2127 344  8 427 1335 759 146 1113  30   0  45 229  17 20 .308 .377 .545 .922      *2DH/3                         LAD-FLA-NYM-SDP-OAK 19      Rick Ferrell 1884 1929 1947 23-41  7076 6028  687 1692 324 45  28  734 931  23  277  10     103  55  29 35 .281 .378 .363 .741        *2/H                                 SLB-BOS-WSH 20    Ernie Lombardi 1853 1931 1947 23-39  6352 5855  601 1792 277 27 190  990 430  50  262  46      18 261   8  4 .306 .358 .460 .818         *2H                             BRO-CIN-BSN-NYG 21      Jorge Posada 1829 1995 2011 23-39  7150 6092  900 1664 379 10 275 1065 936  78 1453  74   1  47 186  20 21 .273 .374 .474 .848     *2DH/34                                         NYY 22       Bill Dickey 1789 1928 1946 21-39  7065 6300  930 1969 343 72 202 1209 678  26  289  31      51  49  36 32 .313 .382 .486 .868         *2H                                         NYY 23    Darrell Porter 1782 1971 1987 19-35  6570 5539  765 1369 237 48 188  826 905 106 1025  45  18  63 102  39 37 .247 .354 .409 .763      *2HD/3                             MIL-KCR-STL-TEX 24    Deacon McGuire 1781 1884 1912 20-48  6938 6291  770 1750 300 79  45  840     515  442  84          47 118  0 .278 .341 .372 .713 *2/395678H1 TOL-DTN-PHI-CLE-ROC-WAS-WHS-BRO-DET-NYY-BOS 25      Bill Freehan 1774 1961 1976 19-34  6900 6073  706 1591 241 35 200  758 626  67  753 114  38  48 138  24 21 .262 .340 .412 .752    *23/HD79                                         DET 26      Rick Dempsey 1765 1969 1992 19-42  5407 4692  525 1093 223 12  96  471 592  13  736  18  63  42 131  20 19 .233 .319 .347 .666  *2H/D97315                     MIN-NYY-BAL-CLE-LAD-MIL 27        Ray Schalk 1762 1912 1929 19-36  6240 5306  579 1345 199 49  11  593     638  358  59         214 177 69 .253 .340 .316 .656        *2/H                                     CHW-NYG 28      Brian McCann 1755 2005 2019 21-35  6850 6067  742 1590 294  5 282 1018 640  71 1054  75   9  59 180  25  9 .262 .337 .452 .789      *2H/D3                                 NYY-HOU-ATL 29      Sherm Lollar 1752 1946 1963 21-38  6220 5351  623 1415 244 14 155  808 671  68  453 115  47  34 184  20 10 .264 .357 .402 .759      *2H/35                             CLE-NYY-SLB-CHW 30    Russell Martin 1693 2006 2019 23-36  6648 5701  803 1416 255  9 191  771 792  46 1211 107  12  36 190 101 51 .248 .349 .397 .746 *2/H5D41679                             LAD-NYY-PIT-TOR 31         Jim Hegan 1666 1941 1960 20-39  5321 4772  550 1087 187 46  92  525 456  79  742   4  72  14 113  15 24 .228 .295 .344 .639        *2/H                         CLE-DET-SFG-PHI-CHC 32       Luke Sewell 1630 1921 1942 20-41  6043 5383  653 1393 272 56  20  698 486   0  307  27     145   1  66 44 .259 .323 .341 .665   *2/H39745                             CLE-WSH-CHW-SLB 33      Steve ONeill 1590 1911 1928 19-36  5566 4795  448 1259 248 34  13  534     592  414  43         130  30 26 .263 .349 .337 .685       *2/H3                             CLE-BOS-NYY-SLB  
    • Yeah the WAR components are available, but it’s not like you can easily calculate those yourself.   I mean, the BB-ref player page will show you Rbat, Rpos, Rfield, Rbaser etc., but I certainly couldn’t derive those numbers.    
    • Frankly I don’t remember reading a single negative thing about his personality or any clubhouse issues during his stint with the Orioles.    I don’t see that as a risk at all.   We’re talking about bringing a guy in on a minor league deal to compete for a spot held by Stevie (.669 OPS, -0.8 rWAR) Wilkerson and for which Richard Urena also will compete.    It’s not like we’re expecting him to be a starting infielder, or paying him millions of dollars, or using a spot on our 40-man roster until such time, if any, as he makes the major league team.   It’s simply not a very big deal.      
    • I'm unconvinced.  He's taking one year's worth of data and not really doing any comparisons to anyone else.  He's inferring from the fact that the 2018 Red Sox hit well with runners on second that the entire sign stealing scheme was worth 50 runs.  That's a stretch.  Teams have varying performances in splits every single year.  From '11-14 the Orioles had a mid-700s OPS with runners on 2nd.  From '15-17 they were in the mid-800s.  Did they have a sign stealing scheme going starting in '15? What he should do is look at 10 years of data across all teams in the league and see if the 2018 Red Sox' variation in performance is a big outlier or unremarkable.  
    • There are plenty of athletes/high draft picks that never ban out. There's also a very fine line between confidence and arrogance. The Beckham quotes I've read paint him an arrogant ego maniac and "me first" type of player. Also, let's not forget his was also suspended for 50 games in 2012 for testing positive for marijuana. Why would we want to bring that kind of mojo into our clubhouse? 
    • If you swing at balls in the dirt and take pitches right down the middle , then this has to be one of the few cases where size does not in fact matter. 
  • Popular Contributors

×
×
  • Create New...