vs. The Yankees 9/7 Fight for First

[Goober Noodles]

[scOtt]

Last week, I got kicked out of a movie theater for bringing my own food. I couldn't believe it. I told the usher that the prices at the concession stand were outrageous, and besides, I haven't had a barbeque in a long time.

Steven Wright

The other day I was coming home. I accidentally stuck my car key into the door. I turned the key and it started up! So I drove it around for a while.

A cop pulls me over. He says "Where do you live?"

I said "Right here."

Steven Wright