Jim Baker and the hot forks of your inquisitiveness

[DrungoHazewood]

Jim Baker writes for Baseball Prospectus. He used to be one of Bill James' assistants back in the 80s.

He might be my favorite writer, he's one of those guys who seems to share my sense of humor 100%. Every chat he does on BP has me rolling on the floor.

Tell me this stuff isn't golden! You can't!

Jim Baker: Good evening. Sorry for the delay. I was ready, but my internet connection was not. It only does this at moments like this or when I'm trying to get a column finished upon deadline. Machines know more about us than they're letting on. They are plotting. For now, they are satisfied with creating small inconveniences. In time, they will work their way up to unleashing the end times. For now, though, let's talk some baseball.

gecko1 (Cupertino, CA): Will we soon have to rename the "Jody Reed Money Left on the Table" award after A-Rod?

Jim Baker: Let's get right to the Rod. No doubt, we will return to this topic many times tonight. I want everyone to take a moment and imagine Alex Rodriguez standing forlornly outside a spring training site. He'll be in a generic uniform with his hat on backwards so he can lean in closer to the fence to watch his former opponents and teammates working out. His glove will be tucked under his arm. One hand will be gripping the chain links of the fence the way people always seem to do when they're being kept out of something. There might be a tear of regret on his cheek

Mr. Blackwell (Wal-Mart Men's Dept.): Who has the worst uniform in baseball?

Jim Baker: I don't know, but I know this much: I used to love seeing the old pics of the New York Giants black uniform. "Why can't teams have black uniforms again?" I would ask strangers at bus depots and soup kitchens. Now that they all seem to have a black jersey and I'm sick of it. "Oooh -- black is so badass." And don't they always seem to wear them on the hottest days? When will the union step in and stop this black jersey madness? Won't somebody think of the children?

Billy Mumphrey (Lincoln, NE): How do you feel about team memorabilia that doesn't conform to team colors? I saw a royal blue Red Sox hat today, and it was kind of jarring.

Jim Baker: I've never understood that. The red Yankees cap? Huh? We need more order in the universe, not less. If elected, I will see to it that nothing ever changes and conformity remains the watchword of a carefully-constructed social order. Thank you.

Dave R (Quakertown, PA): Tonight at 7pm eastern time I listened to a surreal Grady Little/Dodgers GM conference call to announce his "resignation" (I'm sure it took several takes to explain the meaning of this word to Grady but he eventually got it and went along). The whole thing is pretty wild. The Dodgers were talking to Girardi and now Torre while they had a manager that, in theory, was given the opportunity to come back for 2008. Grady says he wanted out. Now Torre almost certainly will be given a 3 year contract there. Your thoughts?

Jim Baker: You know something I didn't know until this very minute? Grady is the brother of Bryan Little. Do you remember him? He either bunted or pretended to bunt on every single one of his 1,072 trips to the plate as a big leaguer. God, it was maddening!

Little should stop managing right now. He's got a career .552 winning percentage. That's pert near top 20. I think he realized that and up and quit. Had nothing to do with Torre.

Brian M (RI): Speaking of the once great braves, what about A-Rod to Atlanta, moving chipper to left and frenchy to CF or have I just been going insane because of all these red sox fans?

Jim Baker: See? You can do this with any team and it feels good, right?

One more question and then I have to soak my wrists in brine.

Billy (Ft. Lauderdale): Pick the 2008 world champion. Sox again? Will the Tigers be back in it?

Jim Baker: It's very hard not to pick the team that is two days removed from completing a sweep. I don't think I would have picked the '05 White Sox, but I would have certainly picked the '66 Orioles or the '63 Dodgers to repeat. Drew will have a better year next year and so will Lugo (only because he can't get worse). Pedroia and Ellsbury...you know where I'm going with this.

So, before the majority of the moves are made, they would have to be the favorite to repeat. This prediction is not binding and may be revoked by formal prospectus prior to April 1, 2008.

I'm not so sure about the Tigers at this juncture. Getting Magglio Ordonez and Curtis Granderson to repeat is going to be a trick. Will their rotation rebound? Too many questions at this juncture for me to be definitive.

Jim Baker: Thanks one and all for tuning in and poking my brain with the hot forks of your inquisitiveness. Enjoy the offseason to the best of your abilities.

I would write like that, but it would be like Deivi Cruz trying to hit like Barry Bonds.

[scOtt]

Good stuff. The way he phrased things, he reminded me of you, Drungo. If I had read Baker first, I would probably have thought vice versa.

What an unfortunate name tho...